Definitions

*Disclaimer on this one. Please stick with it all the way to the end. It gets better, I promise.*

Frustrated. I feel…frustrated.

What defines me? What makes me, well, me? When people talk about me, as in, they mention they know me or some other capacity (not dwelling on people talking about me, I promise. Because that doesn’t matter), what do they say? What lasting impression do I leave?

Kind, good baker, smart, good listener, determined, organized, respectful. Single. Continue reading

Some days are prouder than others

I was at home last week. I always love going home and I’ve come to count on being at home over Memorial Day weekend. It is always a nice way to recharge, and I get to spend time with my family.

This past week, I went home for a different reason, besides the usual recharge and getting to spend time with my family. This past week, my younger brother graduated from high school.  Continue reading

Flowers and Diet Cokes

Two things to know before we get started here: 1) Tulips are my favorite flowers. 2) I like Diet Coke.

Good to go? Okay, let’s go.

Every year in Utah, there is a month long Tulip Festival at Thanksgiving Point. I have lived in Utah for about 7 years now, and the Tulip Festival has existed for all 7 of those years, even longer. I have never gone. I don’t know why. I always say I want to go, and then don’t end up going. In my defense, Thanksgiving Point is a little out of the way, I just never got down there during the Tulip Festival.

Last weekend, that all changed.

I knew it was the last weekend I would be able to go, so earlier in the week, I asked a friend of mine if he wanted to go with me. He said he would, but that he couldn’t go over the weekend, because he was already busy. We both decided, tentatively, that we would go during the next week (which is this week). Then, last Saturday, I found myself with not much to do. I decided to do something for myself, instead of feeling like waiting for someone to go with me. [I’d like to think this is akin to going to a movie by myself, or going to a restaurant alone. I don’t need anyone to go with me, but for some reason, I always prefer to have someone with me, so I don’t look like a loner, really.] I sort of had a reason to go down that way, anyway, so I took the opportunity to go by myself. Continue reading

The Power of Dreams

It’s been a big week for me. I knew it would be relatively big, but I didn’t know how many things would happen…

And by big week, I mean big 72 hours.

Remember a while ago when I said I wanted two things from this year: a new bed and a new car? Well I got both of them.

A few weeks ago, my mom said she would come down and bring a bed for me with her. I was so excited that it was going to happen, and was anxiously looking forward to it.  Continue reading

#blessed

I had a bad day today. There are a few different reasons for this, but those don’t really matter. What it comes down to is, it was a rough day.

When I was in college, I was all about blogging the bad days so that I could get them out of my system and not really bother anyone by needlessly complaining. Also, blogging about the bad days was a chance for me to just get through something by myself, which at the time, was important to me.

I haven’t really had a bad day in a while, and the ones that I have had haven’t been all bad, it’s been more one thing that made it bad. Actually, when I stop and think about it, the bad day I had today wasn’t really a bad day, it was just one thing that made it bad. But I was in a bad mood for the whole day.

Today, I had someone to tell everything to. As I complained more and more, he just listened and offered advice. At one point, I realized that all I was doing was complaining and I felt badly about that, because that’s not fun to hear and isn’t fun to have to endure. So I said I would stop, but I was probably going to continue to be angry, I was just going to have to stand myself on my own two feet. Before I hung up the phone, he had an interesting suggestion. He suggested that I, instead of remaining angry on all the things I thought were going wrong, instead think of or write down all the things I thought had been blessings in not only my day, but my life.

He asked for a follow up, but what he didn’t realize is that I would make it so public. So…ha. Actually, I have no idea what that “ha” accomplishes…moving right along…

I’ll admit. This idea seems silly, but I’m willing to give it a shot. Continue reading

Looking Forward, Looking Up, Now Boarding

General life update.

I realized a few days ago that there are a lot of things I’m looking forward to this year. And I’m actually pretty excited about it.

Does anyone want to talk about it? No. Well, too bad, I’m going to talk about it anyway.

For starters, this week is going to be ride. I’m so so excited. I’m going on a business trip. Yes, me. You read that right. No, I can’t really believe it either. Business trips are reserved for those that wear suits all the time and are stuffy and are SERIOUS business people. I’m none of those things (well, I am a serious businesswoman sometimes…sometimes) and yet tomorrow, I will board a flight that will take me on my first big kid adventure.

Well, I’ve been a big kid for a while, but apparently other people are starting to notice. Yay! (no sarcasm) Continue reading

A picture is worth a thousand words: week 6

senior-picture-three

August 2009. I was standing outside a theater in downtown Billings, Montana. I was in the middle of having my senior pictures taken.

This photo was the photographer’s idea. She liked how the metal of the ticket booth looked against my dress and violin. I was just happy to include such a big part of my life with my senior pictures.

We got the pictures back and, hilariously, I noticed the very faint sock tan I had. I guess that’s what I get for spending almost everyday over the summer on the tennis court.

I still love this picture so much. I really love just how it turned out. I also really loved those shoes. Continue reading