First things first I’m the Realest

[Iggy Azelea, Thank you. I’ll take it from here.]

It’s been quite the couple weeks since I last opened my keyboard to the masses.  Ha! Jokes.  I know that there aren’t many who read my blog.  But those who do, we have some things to talk about.

First of all, holding down two jobs is tough.  Second of all, I’m quickly becoming aware that no one treats those in retail very kindly.  It’s not nice.  It’s not fun.  That is all.

So, it’s been a month since I’ve last blogged.  Let’s see if anything happened…..nope.

Well. Maybe a couple things. (A lot of them may be racing related. Sorry not sorry.)

I’ve been working at my internship during the first part of the week and then I go to Old Navy the rest of the week.  It’s been a bit of an adjustment, but I’m handling it well I think.

The end of the school year meant the return of Netflix.  I was watching Merlin, but it ended.  I cried.  And then I found Gossip Girl.  I’ve become addicted to Gossip Girl.  No, I am not really proud of it.  It’s one of those shows that just sucks you in.  I settle in to watch 2 episodes at the most, and the next thing I know, I’m on my 5th.  I’m not proud of it, but it is just so good, and addicting.

The month of May is a bit of a blur.  I guess that means not much happened.  I did pass all my classes, which is such a relief.  I now only have 15 credit hours left, and they are all “in progress”.  I don’t really know how I feel about this.  I’ve worked really hard through college, and now I’m almost done.

Whoa.

Ok ok ok.  I did get a C+ in my 30 page group paper class.  I was a little bummed about that, but it’s actually okay.  I don’t know.  I’m still not used to getting C’s, so it’s hard to accept them.

But I’m handling it well I think.

The end of May was a little crazy.  Because racing.

Lemme break it down.

Memorial Day was May 26.  May 25 was the Best Day in Racing. Monaco.  Indianapolis 500.  Coca-Cola 600 (don’t really care about that one, but it did happen).

The Trifecta.  Formula 1.  IndyCar.  NASCAR.  All existing in time slot harmony.

The Monaco Grand Prix started at 6 AM.  Yes, I was parked right on the couch ready for lights out.  Monaco is always a bit of a boring race.  But this year, it was not.  There were actual overtakes, my favorite driver, Nico Hulkenberg, executed a beautiful pass right before the tunnel, and I found my favorite part of the circuit.  The tunnel and the chicane right after the tunnel.  It is just so cool.  I could also name most of the corners.  Monaco was my first F1 race last year.  I knew absolutely nothing.  This year, I knew exactly what was going on, who everyone was, and who I wanted to win.  What a difference a year makes.  A year, and obsession level of a sport, or genre (are areas of sport called genres?  They are now) of sport.  This year, as with last year, Rosberg won.  It was fun.  When people find that I actually do wake up that early to watch races, they don’t really understand.  Why do I do it?  Isn’t that torture?  No.  It is the exact opposite of torture.  I genuinely love racing.  I really do.  I can’t explain it, I just do.

Moving right along.

The Indianapolis 500 has a very very special place in my heart.  Indianapolis is where I was born and we’ve watched the race a lot while I was growing up, even though we didn’t live in Indiana.  IndyCar is having a fantastic year.  The cars are all competitive and there are on-track battles all the way to the end of the race.  However, the race started at 10 (I think, maybe it was 9.), and I had church at 11.  Rather than have to tear myself away from the race, I just decided to not watch live.  It was a hard decision, but it turned out alright in the end.  It was SUCH A GOOD RACE.  There were a ton of leader changes, and lots of action on track (even though most of it was retirements/crashes of drivers that I didn’t want to see out of the race.).  Ryan Hunter-Reay won in spectacular fashion, in the second closest finish in the race’s history.  I was SO EXCITED FOR HIM! It was also his first 500 win, which makes it even better.  How do I know all of this if I didn’t watch the race?  YouTube is a wonderful place, my friends.  I found the race in its entirety, and watched it all.  My only regret is not having better race snacks a crucial part of any race.

I didn’t watch the Coca-Cola 600.  NASCAR just doesn’t appeal to me.

Guido  from Cars cheering for Ferrari

[(Not mine, stole it from the internet.) I am not a wholly committed member of the Tifosi (the army of Ferrari fans), but this is so fitting.  Maybe I’ll become a member of the Tifosi when Ferrari sign Nico Hulkenberg.  But that argument is for another time.]

But the amazing thing is that none of these races conflicted with each other time wise.  So, if you wanted to, you could have stayed up all day and watched all 3.  Because Monday was a holiday, so sleeping in was definitely a thing.

I didn’t watch all three, but sleeping in was still definitely a thing.

Memorial Day was a bit lazy for me.  I didn’t have to work, so I went to my Grandparent’s house.  It was fun.

Then began June.  June is going to be and has already been a bit of a whirlwind for me.

It all began with my sister’s birthday.  I knew that my other sister and I would be in charge of her cake and birthday dinner.  I put myself in charge of the cake.  Well, I put myself in charge of both, but I delegated dinner to my sister.  I had no idea what Annie wanted on her cake, so I called her.  This is how it went down:

Me: So what do you want on your cake?

Annie: I don’t know.  I don’t care.

Me: Come on, Ann!  It’s your birthday!  What kind of cake do you want?  Do you want me to bake it or go to a bakery to get it?  White cake with white frosting?  White cake with chocolate frosting?  Chocolate cake with chocolate frosting?  Ice cream?

Annie: I don’t know!  Ummmm…chocolate cake!  With purple frosting!

Me:  Purple?!  Ok, I can do that.  Do you want purple buttercream or just regular frosting?

Annie: Buttercream.

Me: Ok. What do you want on it?  Lewis Hamilton (her favorite F1 driver)?   Your favorite One Direction member?  The Mercedes star?  One of those edible picture things? (I was completely joking on that–she thought I was serious.  Oops.)

Annie: Ooooo! Yes!  Harry is my favorite.  No, I don’t want the Mercedes star…well, maybe I do.  And Batman!  I’ll email you the pictures I want on it.

About an hour later, I received an email with a collage.  And instructions on how she wanted it to look.

Ok.  I had a vision.  And I had to have it done by Tuesday, June 3.

On Monday, June 2, on my way home from work, I thought about what I needed.  Food coloring.  Butter.  Powdered sugar.  Candles?  Toothpicks.  Cake mix.  An offset spatula.

I went to the store where I thought they would have offset spatulas.  They didn’t.  So I decided to get the rest of my ingredients there.  It was not a smart idea.  It was expensive!  And.  When I was selecting the cake mix I wanted to make, I had quite the experience.  I walked into the cake aisle and was met by the usual 399035290382 choices.  There was another woman standing with a cart right against the cake wall.  I politely stepped back and let her make her decision while I made mine from the other wall of the aisle.  I had just come from work and was therefore wearing work clothes–a pink skirt and white shirt.  It didn’t look silly, but then the woman with the cart turned around to push her cart out of the way and out of the aisle.  As she saw me, I wasn’t making direct eye contact with her, but I could just see her out of the corner of my eye.  And that’s when I saw her take in my outfit and give me a disapproving pursing of her lips.  Then she continued with her shopping.  I thought to myself, “Really lady?  It is 6 PM, clearly I just got off work and you are giving me an UP DOWN?!? Oh.  Nuh.  Uh.”

I then hurried to finish my shopping.  I was getting the vibe that I wasn’t good enough to be shopping at this store, and I wasn’t going to stick around to defend myself.

I got home and baked the cake.  I made sure I had baked it the day before to ensure proper cooling.  I was smart.  I also cut out the pictures from Annie’s collage.  I was going to put them on toothpicks and stick the toothpicks in the cake.  It turned out a little better than I had anticipated.  Woo!

The next day, I tried my hardest to fly home from work.  When I say fly…I mean drive as fast as is legally possible.  I got home and hurriedly made buttercream frosting.  I learned a valuable lesson: never rush the buttercream.  It will only end in disappointment.  Well, not disappointment per se, just a lot thinner than I anticipated.

The finished product was loved by all-especially the birthday girl.  Surprisingly, even Mercedes loved it, too.  My sister tweeted a picture of it and they absolutely loved it.  She had been tweeting them earlier in the week when she was making the decision of what to put on the cake and they were shocked that she actually pulled it off.

Well, by her they obviously meant her fabulous sister.  Obviously.

A picture of Annie's birthday cake.

I’m a cake baking genius. Yes yes, I know.

Let’s see…what happened next?  Oh yes!  My best friend got married!  It was a fun day.  I was a bridesmaid.  I hadn’t seen her in a couple weeks and it was nice to see her.  We both cried when she first saw me.  I’m so happy for her.  When the photographer found out I was her best friend, he just had to take a couple pictures of just the two of us.  I can’t wait to see them!  Hopefully that is soon.  I did get a couple pictures, too.

My best friend and her family on her wedding day.

The bride and her family.

I kept asking if I was part of the family, so I could be in this picture.  Out of a joke of course.  I apparently wasn’t that funny, as I am not in this picture.  I KID!  Jk to the jk.

Next week is my sister’s wedding.  Don’t worry.  Sibling selfies will ensue.  I will make sure of it.  I’m excited to see my family.  But mostly I am happy for her.  I really, really am.

As my sister is getting married, she is moving out.  That means I have to get all the utilities changed over to my name.  I had to call the electric company, the gas company and the cable company.  I knew the cable company would be the most difficult to deal with, so I decided to call them last.

Well.  I wasn’t wrong.

First of all, I had to navigate the voice menu thingy.  That’s a nightmare in and of itself.  Then I had to wait for a person to become free to hear my story.  Then when I did, it was quite the adventure.  A man answered the phone.  I don’t remember if he told me his name.  I just explained that I needed to have my name put on the account rather than my soon-vacating sister.  He agreed with me, out loud.

I should have known then that this was to be an adventure.

He then told me that the easiest thing to do would be to simply open a new account, rather than just have my name put on the existing account.  Alright, I agreed.  Make it so, cable boy.

Oh.  He made it so.

Soon after I agreed that that would be fine (a little hesitantly on my part, I might add), he got really excited.  He may have started to yell with excitement.  He told me he was going to HOOK ME UP(!) with the SWEETEST DEAL(!) and get me all the LATEST STUFF(!).  All caps because those are the words he yelled.

He then proceeded to tell me that for less than what we were paying now, I could get upgraded to a DVR (!!! so exciting! Raceday Sundays are already instantly better!) and internet that is 2x as fast as it is now.

….Now hold up, cable boy.  This SWEETEST DEAL seems too good to be true….

He assured me that the price is good for a year, and that I will love the new DVR and all that comes with.  The new modem will even have its own phone number so I don’t have to spend my cell phone minutes and can instead route calls through that number (‘Who has cell minutes anymore?’ I asked myself.  I guess it didn’t matter because he was HOOKING ME UP!)

Now, you might be laughing at all the yelling emphasis.  I’m not kidding when I say that he said all of these things like 5 or 6 times in the 15 minutes I talked to him.

He asked me if I wanted HBO or Showtime.  I told him I just needed ESPN.

I shouldn’t have said that.  It brought out a whole new side to cable boy.

He then told me all about the sport packages and when football season started, I should get the NFL package so I can get ALL THE GAMES ALL THE TIME! (More cable boy yelling)

I finished the TRANSACTION (ok ok. That yelling is for effect.  Cable boy didn’t yell that at me), hung up the phone and thought.  Then I started laughing.  I felt as if I had just been scammed a bit.  I still don’t really know what to think.  Cable boy assured me that I could downgrade at anytime.  I really hope that it isn’t too good to be true.  A DVR would make me one happy race fan.  And sports fan in general.

[SIDENOTE: Wimbledon starts soon!!!!! YESSSSSS!!!]

Since I last blogged, there have been 2 F1 races and 4 (yes. 4. The 500, Detroit 1, Detroit 2, the Firestone 600.–I just wanted to see if I could name them all.) IndyCar races.  I need to blog more!  (Or IndyCar needs to stop with the crazy 3 race weekends in a row.  Just kidding, I love them, and the drivers seem to, too.)  But this last weekend was the Canadian GP.  And who won, but Daniel Ricciardo.  Dan. Dan the Man.  His first F1 win.  He is known as the most smiley, happiest driver on the grid and he was in complete shock that he had won.  And then he started to smile.  I’m pretty sure he hasn’t stopped yet.  I know I haven’t.

I think that’s it.  AND HOLY CROW  IT IS 3 AM!  Don’t tell my mommy I was up this late.  Oh yeah.  She reads my blog.  [I promise I’m going to bed now mom. :)]

There you go.  An update that is waaaaaayyyyy too long.  Apologies.

[It’s also Le Mans weekend! Woohoo!! Bring on the endurance racing.]

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